you would have to excuse my sorrows. this is the first time in 2 decades of my life that i've ever lost someone so dear to me. it was the first funeral i attended.
Got ready by 6pm, waited for the boyfriend for over half an hour before decided to walk out to the streets to look out for him. and there, a green proton saga just swoops past with my boyfriend inside. What the SMURF?! where was he going?! i quickly sent him an sms, 'your girlfriend's house is this way dude.' and after few minutes, he came from the back lane.
'where were you going?! did you miss my lane?!' as i got in the car.
'erm... No! of course not! i just wanted to come from the back lane to surprise you!' said the boyfriend sarcastically.
-______________-"
we were already so late because M.S.G. thought everyone was leaving at 7pm and he had to pump petrol.
ish!lucky for us, crab called and i told him to wait for us to come in another 10 minutes. there were all together 4 cars and the college van which esmond drove to go to klang. i was really happy. in fact, i wasn't sad anymore. i figured maybe i've been crying all day and i'm finally dehydrated! we even got lost on the way there and were heading towards Port Klang to ! never thought it would be this near!
amazingly, we managed to reach there on time. there were so many people, including her old classmates and schoolmates, coursemates, childhood friends, relatives, club friends and even lecturers. it was amazing how many hearts that this one wonderful girl has touched. i was afraid. i changed my mind and i didn't want to go in but i still wasn't crying. saw stephanie and she was bawling... but i still didn't cry. i tried to suck it in so hard. but until as we were lining up to go up to her coffin, and crab turned back to look at me with his hands over his face. i broke down.
she look so beautiful. resting peacefully in her coffin. i was half-hearted to see her. i really didn't want to see her in it. i was so angry. i couldn't help it but let out a big howl as tears kept rolling down. i couldn't stop. no, i didn't want her to see me cry. i didn't want to. she was wearing a black hat and covered with a red cloth over her. but i could still see that she was wearing her favourite green top she wore to her last college function at the orientation night.
L-R: Vanessa, Rosline in her fave green shirt, me and jackie.
she looked lovely. like an angel who was sleeping..
met anton there. a very close friend of rosline. he was telling me and M.S.G. about how she managed to thrive through twice of heart failure and came back before she actually passed away. he told us about the times and stories of her in the hospital when she could still walk and talk, how she used to be when she first met anton when she was 17.. he also told me that the day i left the hospital after a visit, she said to him that i was the closest friend she had in college. i couldn't help it but cry. i was so touched. her mother, who was crying also told me that rosline promised to look after her when she was old... and she kept saying what was she going to do without her...
it was really an emotional time for all of us. will be going for her cremation on thursday at 2pm at the fairy park. lastly again, i would just want to say thank you for all those who turned up and her memorial service. it means alot to her. i'm glad too to see everyone that they actually cared. my only regret is that i didn't spend much time with her. to be with her just to see her laugh once more...
i love you, rosline. take care.
'you don't miss your water till your well runs dry...'
2 comments:
i missed her too..
thanks cal vin..
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